Plot: After a riverboat is swarmed by sharks, word reaches a small town on the Mississippi River, but the local authorities aren’t too concerned, since there’s a good distance between the two locations. More to the point, the town doesn’t want to cancel the annual fish rodeo, which happens to boast the one and only Jason London (Jason London) as a special guest. And since London was the Shark Bite series of films, then who better to handle the situation if by some chance the sharks manage to swim all the way to the fish rodeo, right? But when the sharks do indeed arrive and start putting the chomp down on local citizens, will anyone survive the onslaught, even with Jason London around to lend a hand?
Entertainment Value: Another local, annual tradition and another shark, so of course, we need a mayor to refuse to close down the event, so that’s what we have with Mississippi River Sharks. In other words, the narrative is by no means original and doesn’t go off the deep end like some of its sharksploitation peers. But this is still a passable, often fun watch and while it might not be creative, it has a number of small touches that are most welcome. Jason London plays a twisted version of himself here, a pretentious take on a b movie star and since the franchise is shark related, that is some meta fun to be had. London goes for it and brings a lot of enthusiasm, while Cassie Steele also provides an energetic performance. The non shark scenes work best with one of those two around, otherwise the pace starts to drag a little, at least until the next shark attack pops up. On the plus side, the sharks are around often and while not blood soaked or all that creative, there are a number of kills here and the sharks themselves are humorous creations. Not the worst special effects I’ve seen in this kind of shark movie, but still laughable. Mississippi River Sharks isn’t memorable or that wild, but if you have a soft spot for these low rent, made for television shark attack movies, it is likely going to provide some solid entertainment.
No nakedness in this one. The lack of sleaze is no surprise, as this was a made for television production and the tone is light, often silly, so not a lot of chances for sexual chaos to erupt. This is a shark attack movie, so we have some blood splashed around and some shark teeth clamping down, but don’t expect graphic or overly blood drenched violence here. The shark bites are ridiculous thanks to the outlandish special effects, which make all the deaths look hokey, but that’s part of the fun. There is some light red stuff at times and while not that memorable, some of the kills are humorous to watch, so there’s that. And as I said before, the shark effects are better than expected, though given the movie’s peers, that is not high praise. The dialogue offers a fun mix, from London’s dialed up performance to some cheesy one liners to one of the worst southern accents around. Not a lot of quotable or overly wild lines, but some fun stuff is here and that earns some points. In terms of craziness, this one never goes for broke and seems content to be goofy, rather than outrageous. Even so, some minor bursts of wackiness put a point or two on the board.
Nudity: 0/10
Blood: 2/10
Dialogue: 3/10
Overall Insanity: 2/10
The Disc: This was released by Mill Creek Entertainment in the Shark Bait collection, which houses six total shark movies, plus a bonus alligator flick. The movie looks passable, but suffers from some compression woes. This leads to some softness and digital issues, but again, the movie looks watchable, it just has problems due to being on a disc with two other films. The image is clean aside from the digital concerns, while colors and contrast are in line.
Marc Fusion 