Plot: As the world’s population skyrocketed out of control, the volume of land, jobs, and resources simply couldn’t keep up with demand. This led to the creation of the Humanity Bureau, a government task force assigned to enforce social mandates, ones designed to encourage citizens to be active and contribute. When someone fails to give more than they take from the system, their case is examined and if a change isn’t made, they’re taken to a special locale. In other words, those who can’t bolster society are to be removed from the herd. Noah (Nicolas Cage) is a field agent who meets with those on the brink of removal and while he tries to push for turnarounds, he often is the herald of bad news. After a shootout with an old man who refused to leave his home, Noah arrives at a new case, a mother and her young son. Although he has seen countless cases similar to this one, Noah is drawn to protect these two and as such, makes a decision that could change his entire future.

Entertainment Value: I don’t ask much of direct to video Nicolas Cage movies, as I can leave satisfied as long as Cage uncorks some wild, memorable moments. Even if the narrative is dull or the movie is a total clunker, if Cage can spin his bad movie magic, all is well with the world. But in the case of The Humanity Bureau, the manic, wild side of Cage is nowhere to be found and in truth, his performance is lifeless and pale, a total bore to watch. This sinks the movie, as it has nothing else to offer an audience and with Cage asleep at the wheel, The Humanity Bureau just grinds along and never sparks much of a reaction. The story is bland, with Cage’s Noah woken from his bureaucratic slumber for little to no reason, other than narrative progression, while the rest of the cast is even more of a snooze than Cage is. This one just has nothing going on, a total bore that even Cage fanatics will be disappointed with.

No nakedness. The movie has no sleaze and in truth, doesn’t even earn the R rating outside of some mild violence. That violence leads to a little blood, but it is weak CGI crimson and even then, infrequent and minor. The movie does have some action scenes sprinkled in, but they’re basic and forgettable. No dynamic set pieces or even interesting action elements, just simple bursts of action. As mediocre as the action can be, at least it mixes things up a little. The dialogue is bland and as badly as I wanted Cage to be let loose, even he drowns in boredom here. An emotional outburst would have been gold or some kind of bizarre social commentary rant, anything would have been welcome, but this is pure tedium. That carries over to the general craziness, as the movie fails to offer even a small amount of creative or memorable elements. This is bland, mediocre stuff from start to finish.

Nudity: 0/10

Blood: 1/10

Dialogue: 0/10

Overall Insanity: 0/10

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