Plot: Ronald Miller (Patrick Dempsey) has mowed a lot of lawns and now his hard work is about to pay off, as he can afford to purchase an expensive telescope and soak in the cosmos in style. But while looking at stars is a lot of fun, he dreams of being one, as in being part of the popular crowd at school. So when serendipity strikes and he finds the most popular girl in school in need of some cash, Ronald takes a chance and gambles his cash on potential social riches. Cindy (Amanda Peterson) is cheer captain and the hottest girl in school, so Ronald offers her a thousand dollars to date him for a month, which he thinks will propel him into the elite social circles. She agrees and his plan works, but she finds herself drawn to him, though his ambition of popularity pushes her away toward the end of the month. But can Ronald really buy his way into the social graces of the beautiful people or will there be an even higher price to pay?
Entertainment Value: This one is soaked in 80s splendor, a light, brisk romantic comedy that has a colorful cast and a lot of laughs. I mean, the African Anteater ritual alone is pure gold, but Can’t Buy Me Love is loaded with memorable moments and lines, if you appreciate that special 80s comedy style. The narrative is loaded with cliches, like the nerd going after the queen bee, popularity going to someone’s head, and the queen bee realizing life is about more than cool clothes, but it is all handled in such fun ways, it feels fresher than it should. The humor is effective as well, with just enough slapstick to be fun, but never too much. The scenes involving Ronald’s parents are the most surreal, but they still work, I think. The cast is also immense fun, with a host of 80s talent on deck, with Patrick Dempsey, Courtney Gains, Tina Caspary, Darci DeMoss, Eric Bruskotter, and more. Paula Abdul has also a small role, but the ever suave Gerardo has a nice sized role of his own. But Amanda Peterson steals the show and she is radiant here, she simply glows and commands the screen. A nice mixture of humor and heart, this one is a lot of fun, with a great cast and some fun lines. So if you like 80s comedies, Can’t Buy Me Love is highly recommended.
No nakedness. Most of the girls here seem to bounce from dude to dude, but the sex scenes are tame and feature no naked flesh. But there is a scene where Ronald recites poetry in an attempt to romance the school slut, while he happens to be sitting on the toilet. No blood. There’s no real violence in this one, so the lone red stuff is some splashed around ripple. The dialogue here is great, with a lot of colorful 80s lingo and memorable, quotable lines. Most of it is rather silly of course, but it is still a lot of fun and the cast makes the most of the material. Even Seth Green, who I usually don’t care for, turns in some solid work here. I especially love how Ronald is after he is popular, he is such a douche, but one hilarious douche. Just a wealth of humorous, quotable lines to mine out of this one. Not much craziness however, as this one sticks close to genre conventions.
Overall Insanity: 0/10