Plot: A group of friends plans to reunite for a weekend to catch up, have some laughs, and have a little adventure. But the weekend is off to a bad start when troublemaker Nancy (Jamie Bernadette) is four hours late, forcing them to lose a night and leave in the morning. She also brought a friend from work, whom none of the others know, adding to the inconvenience. But soon the ladies are on the road and soaring above the woods on zip lines. A pamphlet at the hotel advertises some historic ruins in the nearby forest, so the girls decide to venture out and explore. On the way, Nancy’s friend is badly injured and soon bleeds out inside an abandoned house, where the women are forced to take shelter after getting lost. Another of the girls has horrible rashes on her hands and crotch, so the trip seems to be heading downhill. Are the rumors of the ruins being cursed true, or have the girls just encountered a little bad luck?
Entertainment Value: The marketing on All Girls Weekend seems to promote it as a slasher movie, but that’s not the case. After about half an hour or so of talking, the movie does wander into horror territories, but not the slasher kind. The cast is all female, like not a single guy on the roster, but this isn’t Lifetime or girl power rah rah stuff. The women bicker and attack each other, even as their friends die and their own lives seem to be in imminent danger. I like that approach, but All Girls Weekend never dials up the drama or interactions. Someone gets their feelings hurt and the movie just moves on, so things never really escalate into madness. The cast is fine, with Jamie Bernadette as the obvious stand out with her tough girl presence and sharp dialogue barbs. The horror element turns out to be a kind of supernatural curse that doesn’t do all that much, which is of course, not great. All Girls Weekend has some moments of spark, but is too slow and tame to really stand out from the pack.
There’s a bikini area rash, but no nakedness. The blood is minimal, but there is a little red stuff and some assorted other effects. A girl gets frostbite on her fingers and has them cut off, then cauterized. The little peek we get at this process looks cool, but most of it happens off screen. The scene with the best gore potential is done with low end CGI, so I can’t award points for that. The dialogue is mostly girl insults or overly serious, but Jamie Bernadette has fun lines as the rebel of the group. Another girl succumbs to the curse toward the end and goes on a cringefest of a rant about the curse requires blood to keep itself going. The movie is quite tame, but has some wacky moments like the least realistic bear chase ever, a girl being killed by a pile of leaves, trees as handcuffs, and the aforementioned rant about the woods needing blood. Had All Girls Weekend embraced the horror more or at least ran with the melodrama, it might have had a higher entertainment factor. There’s some bright spots, but not enough.
Nudity: 0/10
Blood: 2/10
Dialogue: 4/10
Overall Insanity: 4/10
Marc Fusion 