Plot: The earth has been destroyed and mankind is a distant memory, well except for one test tube baby that just hatched. She is the Star Virgin (Kari Klark), the last human and she is so curious about her silver jumpsuit. After she learns that she is covered because she is messy, she then hears about sex and of course, wants to know more. So her robotic mentor shows her clips from mankind’s rich sexual history, starting with the invention of sex…in 1950? Seeing Adam and Eve tempt fate and partake of the flesh only works up the Star Virgin, however. The mentor tries to calm her down, but ends up taking her on a tour of sex through the ages, or at least sex in random times and places. But with no other human to indulge with, will the Star Virgin be forever chaste?
Entertainment Value: Star Virgin is pretty awesome movie, with a cool sci/fi main story and some time traveling side plots. The tone of Star Virgin is light and humorous, with plenty of sex, but a strong emphasis on silliness as well. The dialogue is all about bad jokes or odd twists on situations, like when a greaser makes his girlfriend promise she won’t tell the guys about their sexual rendezvous. So if you want romance or intense eroticism, Star Virgin might leave you limp. Kari Klark is hilarious in the title role, stumbling through her lines and always being fun to watch. The rest of the cast is solid too, but Klark tends to be the most memorable. But if you’ve seen a good amount of classic porn, you’ll recognize others as well, like veteran Mike Ranger. I appreciated the goofy humor of Star Virgin and I think anyone into classic era porn should give it a chance.
A hardcore porn has sex so of course, Star Virgin has nudity and then some. We have straight sex, food play, a MFM threesome with Dracula and Richard Nixon, anal, a MFF threesome with some light lesbian action, a dildo party/orgy, and a girl masturbating with a lightsaber. No blood. The dialogue is all lame jokes, but it is still so much fun to see this kind of of the wall humor in a porn. On the crazy side, we see a guy rub peaches all over a girl’s crotch and then jam a banana up her snatch, all on the orders of a man dressed like a snake. Then slapstick sex with Dracula and Richard Nixon, complete with wacky sound effects, not to mention a woman who queefs out the flame on a book of matches. There’s also a literal explosion of cream when the Star Virgin finally gets her rocks off. So yeah, this one is pretty zany even by 70s porn standards.
Overall Insanity: 7/10